Comments on Student Work
Posted by merrylenz on February 9, 2006
Please be sure to tell what student’s work you are commenting on. Remember criticism is to help the writer, not hurt him. Saying something good without backing it up with evidence is pointless and will not be accepted.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:29 am
I just read your story it was good but please add more deatails and that will make the reader care more about the charecter.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:30 am
I really like conners story. I guess that i liked it because he discribed the cold body of cheeder. He did a really nice job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
February 9th, 2006 at 10:31 am
Anna,
I thought your story was very good, I thought it was sad too. I think your story was very detailed and spescific.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:32 am
Anna,
i thought your story was very sad. but i thought it was a good story to put on the blog. do you know what the red stuff was dripping from his nose?
February 9th, 2006 at 10:35 am
connor,
I thought your story was really good, The part when she died was really sad I thought. I liked the part when you went and got a new rat named sandy.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:35 am
conner that was a wonderful story i thought it was good because you discribed how his body was cold and stiff.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:36 am
I fell the same way as anna when my grandpa died. To make me fell better I always have a picture of the people that died in my family.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:37 am
I think the story Katelynn wrote is really sad. I wish your horse was still alive so it could live a happy life and die of old age. Except that I’m happy that you got a new horse.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:37 am
Dear katelynn,
I realy liked you story.I wish you would of told us what Fancy looked like.Where did you bary your horse?
Please comment my story too:D
L.O.L.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:38 am
Your story was good you described how much you licked it and what it looked liked!
February 9th, 2006 at 10:38 am
I think that story that Tyler typed was imporantant to him because i don’t get to spend time with my grampa. He lives far away from me. So if tyler heres this I realy mean it he’s LUCKY!
February 9th, 2006 at 10:39 am
I just read Tyler’s story and I thought it was pretty good because I like to fish.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:40 am
heather,
i really like your story. i think that you should of put more detail of what the girl looked liked. i think you could have added a little more of ending to your story. but the one thing i like about your story was that you put alot of hard work in it.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:42 am
Heather,
I was wondering if the story you wrote about the girl that hit you was true or not. Other than that I thought it was really good. I thought it was mean that she hit you.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:43 am
Dear Anna,
I loved your Story!!! It was so sad when JAKEY Died.I liked all of the explaining you did in it. That is how people can understand your story better.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:44 am
Connor I fell the same way. my old hamster died last year. I felt said for him . His name was Eathen. If you new how she died you should say that.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:47 am
Connor,
Your story was sad because Cheddar died. I thought that the detail was good too.
Eric
February 9th, 2006 at 10:48 am
Heather your story is great but odd.How did you get in the hospital for 2 weeks just from a little punch?
February 9th, 2006 at 10:49 am
Zach I thought if the Story you wrote about the kid who took a knife to school was very good and bad. I thought it was good because you put alot of work into it and I know you worked very hard. the Part I thought was bad was when the kid took a knife to school.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:50 am
taylor,
i am very sorry that your grandmother had died. i think you should put a little more detail in to your story then it would be a very good story
February 9th, 2006 at 10:50 am
Dear Katelynn,
that is said that your horse died but before you print your story you should check for errers. o.k.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:53 am
Sted,Your story was good but I think you should make it longer.
February 9th, 2006 at 10:53 am
Tyler I thought your story was pretty good. I know how you feel when you are lonely or sad because I sometimes I get lonely well I have to go .
February 9th, 2006 at 10:56 am
Dear Tyler,
Your story was the most detailed story i’ve read so far. I think you did a pefect beginning middle and end.
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:28 am
thankyou conner i thought your story was very detaild too.
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:28 am
I would like to comment ambers newspaper I think it is realy good! I think hers is just as good as steeds & mine newspaper,
Signed,Mackenzie
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:33 am
Steed,
Your story is great but you need to work on your
spelling! l.o.l.:-)
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:34 am
nick,
i thought you had a good story you just needed to tell why tyler had moved and you could have also put more detail.i like the part when you were looking out the window because i like to do that same thing only when i am in a car.
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:35 am
Dear Tyler,
I know how you fell when your sad. It does work when your grandparents make you fell better. I think you should put what the boat looked like. I think thats actualy interesting.
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:35 am
Nick
i thought your story was pretty good. the only part that I did not like about it was when you put his phone number. I thought it was bad because someone could look in the phone book aand look at the adress and go to his house. So maybe next time you should not put their phone number or adress.
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:36 am
i just read michaels story. You need to and more detail to your story.
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:37 am
i just read michaels story. You need to and more detail to your story. i like it though.
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:37 am
I just read Steed`s story about his dog. He is good at storys about his dogs, I can teel he likes his dogs.